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January 13, 2006
TGIF @ NYP: A Rich Helping of Cinematic Tabloid Goodness
Friday always represents a special day for the New York Post--the one day of the week when the tabloid's big entertainment and gossip guns really blast together at full strength. But some Fridays--today in particular--resonate a little more powerfully than others.
It is not just Liz Smith's putative inside track to this year's Oscar nominations, which she claims to have extracted from someone "fresh from Hollywood, sitting down with (people) such as Steven Spielberg, etc." Nor is it Cindy Adams's dispatch from Wednesday night's Bruckerrific Glory Road premiere, to which she "schlepped" through the rain to schmooze with Josh Lucas, Mehcad Brooks and "another gorgeous black guy," Derek Luke. Nor is it Page Six bounding between lukewarm AVN award plants and Chuck Norris jokes (which, in fairness, are sort of funny). Nor is it Vinnie Musetto's verrrrrrrry cautious non-review of the new gay-giography, That Man: Peter Berlin. Nor is it the Post bumping Lou Lumenick's Last Holiday pan--headlined "DONE TO DEATH"--up against Paramount's skyscraper ad for the same film.
Nope. Today's greatest hit has to be this single determination in summing up a potential fistfight between Lindsay Lohan and Scarlett Johansson:
The cause: Maybe it's because Scarlett gets all the critically-acclaimed roles, like Match Point and Lost in Translation, and Lindsay's last movie was about a talking car. Or, Lohan's still sour that she's bedding Jared Leto, Scarlett's sloppy seconds.
Granted, the authors predict a victory for Lohan. But I have to ask: If the New York Post drops the "sloppy seconds" bomb on you (in your name, at that!), can you ever really be a winner? Can even a three-day weekend be enough time to rebound from that kind of ignominy?
I guess it could always be worse: Caryn James of all people could show up in The Times telling you how to re-edit your movie. I am sure a shamefaced Terrence Malick is booking an Avid suite as we speak.
Posted by stvanairsdale at January 13, 2006 03:06 PM
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