The Hot Blog

Comedy Does Not Get Much Better!!!!

Battters up!

Well, it certainly does, but I really enjoyed that. I already loved the trailer for Shoot-em-up, so thanks for the good (if necessarily partial) word. But what really interested me is this H.P Lovecraft project, for that writer has never been done justice to on screen. What is it? "At the Mountains of Madness?"

That was a great interview, very informative and fascinating.

I used to think of Don Murphy as a grizzly bear, now I think he's a teddy bear.

Grizzle Grizzle

Just wait for Pt 2 in which he nuzzles, kills, and strips the skin off the Ammo hostess.

There's a waitress in LA with enough spare skin to strip?

really good piece.

for the record, im a big believer that people would post differently if they used their real names.

also for the record, i use my real name.

Good stuff. Funny but pretty tough crack on Drew, DP.

"for the record, im a big believer that people would post differently if they used their real names"

Like Spam Dooley?

Leer-
Yes, he would have been better had he used his correct name. Like I ALWAYS DO.

You're seriously claiming you're not Spam Dooley despite the fact that

a) You and Spam post in exactly the same way

b) You ended your posting hiatus earlier this year to post insider information about Transformers contracts and the movie itself

c) A quick Google search turns up a 2005 post by you on your own site where you brag about being banned on other message boards using the name "Spam Dooley"

You seem like the type of guy who would typically own up to that posting alias with pride. I'll assume the Hickenlooper shit is stopping you from doing so.

By b), I mean that Spam was the identity who posted that information.

Wow, I had no idea it was so easy. Thanks James.

And I got a shoutout! Thanks guys.

you got a shoutout by being called a douchebag.

i wouldn't exactly call that a win.

Yes, but who can say what's a win and what's a loss in this strange, workaday world.

Q: Yes, but who can say what's a win and what's a loss in this strange, workaday world?

A: douchebags.

Then you answered your own question.

well, it takes a douchebag to identify and properly identify another douchebag.

but then again, i think most people are douchebags.

Anghus, you are a good person and worthy of happiness.
Do with that what you will.

i could give a shit about that spam dooley nonsense, way to derail a conversation.

I'm not usually a fan of these dinner w/ two pieces but I guess it all depends on the guest. Don's a very entertaining character, he should do this again when Shoot Em Up comes out. Fast-talker with lots of amusing inside-hollywood anecdotes. Kind of like a very LA/producer version of Marty.

Also Don seems to have a mild ADD fascination w/ the fries.

Martin

Marty who? Because I think you just flattered me way too much.

And I'm Irish- Fries are like milk to us.

And Jeff- I don't think you are a douchebag you just have waaaaay too much time on your hands.

I find it hillarious (in my own mind) that Don mentioned someone optioned the Smurfs. When I was trying to bait you into a silly blog battle Don, I was going to say I heard YOU had optioned the Smurfs and were eyeing Jessica Simpson as Smurfette and Sean Connery as Papa Smurf.

well Jeff I guess any attention is better than none, heh heh heh.

I enjoyed that discussion. Don's not a grizzly bear or a teddy bear...more like a Kodiac bear with higher ed.

Hey the real name stuff... I can't post under my real name. After you have to go through a couple orders of Protection you just get fed up, so I am Lota the manimal, it's easier and safer.

i could totally see someone making a smurfs movie. it's boring, unoriginal, and mines a facet of people's childhood.

hooray for hollywood.

i better get my Who's Your Caddy tickets from Fandango now before there's a rush.

Jordan Kerner has the Smurfs in development at Paramount. No word on a production date.

Hey Don, having finally gotten around to seeing Transformers last night, I have to say: You did not rape my childhood :-)

For whatever other problems there may or may not be with the film, the scenes with transformers actually talking felt warm and fuzzy - just right. I just wish there were more of them!

Transformers 2 - No humans, all robots all the time! You heard it here first :-)

If like...Spike Jonz or Michel Gondry did a live-action Smurfs movie, I'd be all over it. Or Harmony Korine! Can you imagine??

I'd rather see what Ralph Bakshi does with the Smurfs.

Excellent interview. It's always good to be able to put a face to a voice on The Hot Blog.

Don, you are a very engaging and colorful speaker. I am glad you spoke highly about Oliver Stone also. I had the chance to speak to him when I was almost out of film school and without going into detail, I also found him and his company to be very honorable.

On a side note, I think The Smurfs option is actually genius. Done right, I think it is a marketing cash cow. Out of curiosity alone, it would have my money.

I look forward to Transformers 2.

If Smurfs was directed by Michael Bay and I had access to large quantities of illegal drugs I might see it.

... and if the smurf movie also had a strong communist undercurrent:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Smurfs_and_communism

Martin, in TF, Bay controls The Transformers, in The Smurfs, the Smurfs control Bay.

It's Tuesday Dave and Don, what's going to happen?(seeyounexttuesday)

wow
somebody else explain it to her
my jaw is on the floor

Your jaw's always on the floor, you look like Mr. Bill. Get over yourself and explain it.

Why have you got to be insulting about me? The fact that you don't understand one of the basic slams of all time (which has not been directed at you, my dear lady, btw) is either a signal of your denseness or the fact that you don't get out much. It doesn't require mockery.

Mr. Bill, you made me go to the urban dictionary. You're calling NF a cunt because she shook you down over a story someone shook you down over? You must not get out much.

Obviously, we're going to start seeing more movies based on 1980's properties. There are only a few, it seems to me, that are legitimately memorable enough to work. Everybody from my generation knew years ago that a Transformers movie was imminent. An A-Team movie would probably work as well. The concepts sell both.

The other no-brainer is MacGyver. Seriously. Jump on that shit. That's a franchise.

What about Hunter? Tough cop with a hot partner. Cool name should sell it alone.

I'm not sure that G.I. Joe will translate that well because they'd really have to develop it to make it work. Like, where and when is this actually taking place? Although Stormshadow and Snake Eyes would be cool, are they really going to have the Joes yell, "Yo Joe!," and the Cobras yell, "Cobra!"?... When the Cobra jets blow up, will the pilots actually die, or will we still see them always parachuting to safety?

What else?... He-Man? Actually, it's not such a bad idea if you factor in She-Ra, because that'll secure the female audience, I suppose. Just cast it better than Dolph Lungren and Frank Langella.

Voltron and Thundercats are pretty obvious -- though I don't think their concepts are compelling enough. I get the feeling they'd wind up as the Fantastic Four of '80s retreads -- cheeseball.

Dunno... Stanley Tucci as Gargamel?...

How long till Hollywood starts raiding the sitcoms? ALF? Perfect Strangers? Charles In Charge? Punky Brewster?

"thundercats" is under development. saw the article in the trades a couple weeks ago. i'm pretty sure "g.i. joe" is too.

"micronauts" would be cool, though

Somewhat related, I understand that based on the success of Transformers that the producers of other upcoming tentpole movies are worried about not having 'enough action' in comparison, which could be the kiss of death if they start meddling in something like Iron Man.

Bill Murray as Gargamel....duh.

sir ian mckellan as papa smurf

Fraggle Rock.

Very interesting interview. I thought the discussion of Drew/jeffmcm being asses online but probably decent in real life to be funny, considering that you, Don, seem very likeable in this interview, but come off (often, but not always) as a first-class jerk online.

That said, I have a question, Don. Is Shoot-em-up an action-comedy, or is the tone mostly serious, with occasional quirk? I ask because, in another forum I frequent, the Shoot-em-up trailer is killing, but people think it's going to be a comedy, due to the one-liners and over-the-top action. What can we expect?

Gem

Manimal.

Knight Rider. Of course.

The thing Transformers got right was that it played it straight. Too often, movies take a well-known property, Starsky and Hutch and The Dukes of Hazzard come to mind, and fuck with it. If you're taking material that's liked enough to be remade years later, why make fun of it in the process? Neither Starsky or Dukes were originally dumb sitcoms (might've been dumb though). By remaking them as cheesey shite the filmmakers were effectively leaning on the fans of those shows to come see them, but then pissing in their faces by mocking the shows.

The best 80s tv show was Granada's SHERLOCK HOLMES with Jeremy Brett. Now that one would not only make a bundle if done properly but could get Oscars.

Today, the great Craig Biggio announced this is his final MLB season, and that he's retiring after 20-odd-years with the Houston Astros. Tonight.... he hits a grand slam.

Now I ask you, Don: In all honesty, would you dare to let a director put something like that in a movie? Or if you read that in a script, would you say, "Oh, no, audiences would never buy that..."?

Don, any chance talking Harry Harrison into letting Stainless Steel Rat into a movie?
There's like seven eleven books in the series. I smell franchise.
My wife is a Major Agitator for having Bruce Campbell play Slippery Jim.

Holly We all call Nikki that word because, well she IS one.
Mutiny A Team, Knight Rider,Thundercats and He Man are being developed. MacGyver?
Jeffmcm you read that thing about action on a bathroom stall or where?
Mystery it is an action COMEDY and I am a jerk at all times see my answer to Jeff above
Sinclair with WHO as Holmes?
Joe No
Doug I looked at the Rat five years ago but Fox was gonna ruin it with Jan DeBont. Maybe I should look again?

David Thewlis as Holmes, Timothy Spall as Watson, John Cleese as Lestrade. There, it's now been cast.

And yes, the Rat needs to be filmed, and also yes, Campbell would be ideal.

That was interesting. Shoot'em up does have Christian Cage and Jericho in it. So you got me right. However, GI JOE, is easy to do in this day and age. You just have to figure out how to make it work in the respect to this day and age. Cobra are a terrorist orginization but they are something more. They are Al Queda to the power of 10. Adapted correctly: that could scare the living crap out of people. Cobra with the power and the influence to effect the world as terrorist orginization without a bomb or regular terrorist activities, and only one team of people can stop them. That's a concept folks. YO JOE!

Don: Er, no to which question?

I'd like to see a version of Sherlock Holmes with a zombified Jeremy Brett in the lead.

Don: my source is someone who works on the film. In a position to know.

Hey, why not a two-fer, Sherlock Holmes in a musical? Seriously: No one ever filmed Baker Street, the musical that had a fairly respectable Broadway run (with the great Fritz Weaver as Sherlock H.) in the '60s. I bet Hugh Jackman might be interested...

how about they make a movie based on an original idea?

I know, what the hell am i saying. that'll never happen.

Ralph Fiennes as Sherlock Holmes. He even has the nose for it.

Don, Christian Bale as Holmes.

Joe- to your previous question
Anghus- Shoot em Up is an original script
IO- Ummm those two guys are NOT in it- Jericho in the background for 1 sec and the other guy not at all

Not getting the Sherlock thing- is it a different take on Sherlock? of just the original stories

I'm aware they're being developed. I was speaking generally about '80s properties and what would work.

Yeah, MacGyver. Seriously. Show/character is still referenced regularly in everything from SNL to Family Guy to...MasterCard. Lots of action and light humor, guy makes bombs out of rubberbands and toothpicks...always saves the day.

It would be great if the second half is edited, and that's why it's taking so long.

He is no doubt cutting out the part where I call Nikki Finke every obscure, little known cuss word I could find (like biotch, whore, and revenuer) and the part where I compare you to yesterday's prunes.

Bet your wife thinks you're shit, but you're warm, and you think editing is cutting out the bad parts. Ha-ha-ha-ha.

My wife thinks board trolls who don't even have the brains to get the most common slang are THE shit- she loves people like you- medium rare on toast.

I think you mean she likes it on the hoof. You were squeezed and took your post down.

What are you talking about you lunatic? I have never been "squeezed" or taken down a post. MAKE SENSE you dumbbell.

it's so nice to be back at aicn.

what? this isn't aicn?

you coulda fooled me

congrats Holly. you have accomplished an alarming feat...I always respected DOn Murphy but it appears as though you've made everyone enjoy his company considerably more after your Bicycle Bob-like streams of consciousness laced with profanity and interruptions of non-sequitors. Funny how you can't seem to talk about film at all.

Thanks again D-Po for the long lunch with Murphy & the updates.

I can understand Don gaslighting me about his disappearing post, but you ganging up on me, for what? bicycle bobbing?

fair enough. shoot em up is an original. i just wish there were more of them. i looked back at what i saw this summer, and outside of waitress and knocked up, almost every other film was a sequel, comic book movie, or tv property brought to film.

that depresses me.

answer the question you dimwit Holly

WHAT POST ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT???
You never answer ....

So it sounds like Shoot Em Up is a comedic version of the second half of Children of Men?

that's funny jeff
and not half wrong

Don, I've done that several times already. You linked Bay's post and opened a comments line. There were comments, very interesting ones. Both came down. You even wrote "what's with all the links going nowhere?" Yes, at the time, it wasn't just yours. I think Lota's blaming me for the delay in the 2nd half of your interview; she seems very smitten with you and is disturbed by my lack of writing about film, and I don't want to stress her out any longer.

ahhhh
No you haven't done that before but now you are clearer.
Yes, at one point SOMEONE on my board linked to the Bay rant. Yes there were comments, including one by me. Then Michael thought better of it and took it down. Once he did that I reciprocated. Nobody MADE anybody do anything that is your weird fantasy.

I rest my case.

Years ago, when I entered academia, I was warned: Be careful, because the in-fighting is all the more vicious because the stakes are so small. I think the same could be said for on-line posting, don't you think?

it is more like don't argue with crazy people
even when you win you lose

Don, lots of people saw the post. You were clear it was you, so why bother to slide, when you can't hide? It's crazy.

I rest my case, again. I find this very boring.

it is more like don't argue with crazy people
even when you win you lose

Don, how right you are. How very, very right you are.

Joe caves. Do people lie when the stakes are small? Some do.

No offense, Holly, but you weren't the crazy I was thinking about.

Good to know Joe, the stakes are so low for you and Murphy that you're free to lie.

"Yes, at one point SOMEONE on my board linked to the Bay rant."

Excuse me, Holly, but just what are you talking about? What have I lied about? I was merely agreeing with Don's observation that you shouldn't argue with crazy people. (A mistake I have made many times in the past, and hope to avoid in the future.) As for the earlier "low stakes" remark -- well, that was more in the nature of a general overview. People tend to get very intense here (and elsewhere, on other sites) about ultimately meaningless things.

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