The Hot Blog

From a website that will remain nameless, someone posted a slightly off topic reply that suggests a good Monday topic: unintended marquee LOL/LMAO's.

Either from a string of titles that become greater than the sum of their parts (ie BABY MOMA LEATHERHEADS IN THE VALLEY OF ELAH), misspellings or just your own stupidity (as in my example).

My own entry:
Back in the 80's, I was driving home one night and caught the billboard for the Gamecock theater (long gone, alas) showing
THE EVIL
THAT
MEN DO
out of the corner of my eye (it was an area infamous as a speed trap by the local Cayce cops).

Only, my mind's eye saw this: THE EVIL MENUDO.

Which, many of my friends thought the sugar-pop group was...

I believe I experienced from that "X-Files: I Want to Believe" trailer what women experienced from the "Sex and the City" trailer. With all the promising stuff coming out this summer, I hate to say it, but I'm looking forward to "X-Files 2" now more than any of it.

Only thing happening today is Mega Fox...

Not to be confused with Mega Snake...

1) Speculate... how come David doesn't go to Cannes?

2) Michael Wilmington's reviews here are better than they were in Chicago... how come?

MEGAN FOX OWNS YOUR ASS.

BOW TO HER. BOW.

Lex, if I register STUFFTHATOWNSYOURASS.blogspot.com, can I hand it over to you?

Megan Fox is hot, until you notice the "Brian" tattoo. Brian Austin Green is the last thing I want to think about when looking at Megan Fox.

1. I am long on record on the Cannes issue. It's expensive, irritating, and the elements that are relevant to my work are all available to me within two months of screening at Cannes.

Specifically, it would have been lovely to love The Pianist, No Country For Old Men and/or Mystic River 8 weeks earlier than I did. But none of these movies became relevant in America until after I had plenty of chance to see them.

The truth is, guys like Bob Koehler go to Cannes and make it worth the trip, focusing on the pictures that are least likely to end up getting a significant theatrical release here. But most of the press that goes ends up obsessing on Indiana Jones and other high profile stuff. The same is true in Toronto and to a lesser extent, Sundance, but there is a much closer call and response as an American journalist at those festivals.

Cannes is a magic vacation for most journos these days, an insane expense in an era of DVD and news cutbacks. If many of the outlets who shell out for Cannes were serious about coverage, they'd be in Berlin and Venice as well. But they are not.

It is my hope to start spending more money on European fests starting this fall... and maybe even return to Cannes next year. We spend a lot on festivals at MCN and Cannes is one I just don't feel we have to do.

That said, I will be appearing at The American Pavilion on Wednesday.

2) Bringing in Wilmington to MCN was an acknowledgment of his history and skills. For him, it is also a chance to let loose and let the writing fly again after living inside a MSM box for a long time.

My philosophy with all hires has always been to hire smart people and to let them float or sink on their merits. The puppetmaster thing works at EW, but it has never been of interest to me. The voice of MCN is built on diversity and strong ideas (and occasionally, the opportunity to grow into being a pro), not my ideas or opinions. As a result, I proudly disagree with my writers every single week.

In all my years writing, i never had an ordeal like i did with this one particular script which has gone through three deals over six years.

Finally, i got the paperwork in for a deal which would see it going into production later this year. Not a huge film or anything, but there was part of me that believed it would never get made because every time it came close to production, someone would say 'you know, this is kind of hard to market' and the whole project would completely fall apart in subsequent months.

So im sitting here staring at the paperwork with the slightest bit of anticipation and a lingering sense of dread that once again this thing is going to crash and burn like the hindenburg.

its also my wedding anniversary today, so im planning on taking the Mrs. out to dinner.

Oh, and i saw Speed Racer. Loved it.

You're appearing as what, a MasterSlaveMaster?

CinemaPhreek: Best one I ever saw was a drive-in marquee for this triple feature:

Spy Kids
Blow
Crocodile Dundee in Los Angeles

I found a pic of it here:
http://emericaskate.com/team/jerry-hsu/photos/spy-kids-blow-crocodile-dundee/

Brian owns Megan and it gives me the heebes. Yancy: that's a good one.

So Emile Hirsch just fired his agent, and UTA. Good move, kid. Because it was UTA's fault Speed Racer was mis-marketed, mis-cast, and just a bad idea in general. Maybe I just can't separate the actor from the kid he played in Into The Wild, but either way, he's really starting to bother the fuck out of me.

I'm here in Columbia, SC, and glad to report that David O. Russell's political satire "Nailed" resumed shooting this morning after the weekend SAG shutdown.

Here's hoping they get the financial probs worked out--I hear it is a funny and sharp script.

Any thoughts on the likely effect of Capitol's financial woes? While NAILED is back up and running, Nikki Finke has it that at least two other films are having problems now...any chance ThinkFilm or others could be affected?

I'm just a local writer here in SC, no insight into those questions.

But since I have the floor: I think it is a shame that you can get the Speed Racers of the world financed to the tune of $150m (or whatever), and little films that might have something more significant to say have to struggle. Just IMO, of course.

And I don't mean that because SR is a financial disaster or that I wanted it to fail. I just like the kind of movies that Russell makes vs the big FX orgasms. I guess in retrospect, the fact that I Heart Huckabees got made at all (and with that cast!) is kind of a miracle.

Thanks for the comments, York...was actually wondering if David had any thoughts on Capitol, but I'm not much used to posting on blogs, so my apologies if that wasn't clear :)

Can't say I'm a huge fan of David Bergstein/Capitol's aesthetic choices in general, tho I agree it is a shame indies have to struggle for financing...any thoughts, David?

LOL--I was sort of hoping you meant it for DP and not me. I definitely ain't the guy to ask, and by a long shot. ;^)

Haha, thanks for the response anyway :)

Aris: keep your hate on away from Speed Racer. I do agree that firing all of those people was a total dick move on his part, but the movie was not a bad idea. You know what a bad idea was? Warners not ripping off the CARS ad campaign.

Aris didn't say a single thing about the movie.

Whoops, never mind about that last post.

Second theater many years back-12 Monkeys had moved screens, so the Woody Harelson movie now showing was MONKEY TRAIN.

RICCI WAS HOT AS HELL AND OWNED THE WHOLE MOVIE.

RICCI FOR THE WIN.

Did she just live in the house with the family? That would OWN to have a LIVE-IN RICCI.

Things that OWNED:
RICCI, Goodman, Roger Allam, FOX, that crazy, awesome cross-country race, especially the ice tunnel part, the colors, the flashback scene where young Speed watched the race with his dad, the Asian chick, Royalton's HOT-ASS secretaries, the Japanese dude from Last Samurai.

Things that RUINED THE MOVIE:
Spritle. Thanks for Jake Lloydin' the movie, kid. I was just EMBARRASSED watching some kiddie crap with a fat kid and monkey eating candy and zooming around in fast motion.

Spritle and the monkey were the best parts of the movie, as far as I was concerned. Ricci was barely in it (which is fine with me because I haven't liked her in a movie for years).

Lex: you are hating on Sprittle? Man. I am at a loss for words. Few things are better than a monkey hyped up on goofballs! My fave ending credit sequence this year so far.

The best funny marquee I've seen was

Erin Brockovich
Screwed
My Dog Skip

http://www.funnysign.com/funnysign/078_triple_feature.jpg

Jeff, I'd say that RICCI OWNS YOUR ASS, but I don't want the image and my head and you wouldn't deserve the juxtaposition anyway after dissing her like that. She RULED so effing hard in Black Snake Moan I couldn't even stand for half an hour after the movie.

IO, monkeys are cool, but that kid was annoying, and any scene with him was embarrassing.

Aside from all that, did anyone else spend the entire time wondering if Speed's crew man/mechanic was either Dax Shepard affecting an Aussie accent, or Dwight Yoakam's son from Down Under?

DAX YOAKAM, SON.

I have to type this: CHIM-CHIM OWNED YOUR ASS! CHOKE ON IT, LEX! CHOKE ON IT!

Lex, please remind me to never have a conversation with you again. It's unpleasant. I get more out of IOI because at least I know he's not putting on an act.

Says the man who likely refreshes 10 times a minutes just itching to pounce with a reply to any- and everything I post. (Though you seem to do that for everyone and on every subject, so maybe I'm not all that special.)

Anyway, I don't know what I said that was unpleasant, other than offering a succinct appraisal of the It movie du jour. You're the one who bad-mouthed an AWESOME actress with your typical blunt-bait routine.

Lex, I'm just incredibly tired of you talking about your goddamn boners.

Damn, I should have stopwatched that one.

Lex, the surprise shouldn't be that I respond to you when you act infantile; it's that you've cock-thwapped everybody else into submission and acceptance of your bizarre behavior.

Seacrest out.

Anybody know if RICCI is on MySpace?

I bet she would think I own.

not to undervalue lexs 'bizarre behavior' but, really mcmahon, io barely approaches english in his bizarre behavior.....
now i have to go look up 'cock-thwapped'.....

Back to the oddball marquee listings.
One time, while strolling through a predominately gay neighborhood of Chicago, I noticed that the area movie theater was showing "Faces of Death," of all things, as a midnight movie attraction. Thus, when they added it to the marquee along with the main feature, it read:

PHILADELPHIA
FACES OF DEATH.

His bizarre behaviour? You in particular Jeff bash the hell out of him. While Camel treats him in the fashion people like Camel treat people. So it's not for a lack of trying that Lex is who he is -- act or not.

Again... unless Heat post that he wants him to stop. He's not doing anything wrong. Why some posters have to REGULATE on other posters in this thread, remains a mystery to me.

Scoot... it's not my fault you are an old ass cracker. Seriously... get a handle on your life.

'old ass cracker'?????...is that an ageist, gay slur?

IO: "old ass cracker" is ageist and racist. Behave, or the PC police will beat down your door.

IT'S NOT A MONKEY, IT'S A CHIMP. CHIMPS ARE NOT MONKEYS!!! GRRRRRRRRRR!

Joe: it stands. If you want to act that way. You get treated that way. He personally insults me time and time again. He can deal with the way he comes off to me. If you got a problem. What's those two words Mr. Paul Levesque?

Speaking of obscure references, Scooterz, I think of IOI as sort of a cross between Henry Darger and Timmy from South Park. Lex gets my goat more because he actively chooses to be someone other than the reasonably intelligent, articulate person he can be sometimes, in favor of puking in our collective faces and acting surprised that we don't thank him for it.

I'm pretty sure I only treat Lex and IO the way I supposedly "treat people". If I treat anyone else like I do them then I sincerely apologise.

Although I'm not exactly sure what "people like (me)" means? Gay? Australian? What else could you be referring to?

I'm pretty sure I only treat Lex and IO the way I supposedly "treat people". If I treat anyone else like I do them then I sincerely apologise.

Although I'm not exactly sure what "people like (me)" means? Gay? Australian? What else could you be referring to?

mcmahon -- i know what you mean (your analogy is perfect) but i do find lex amusing while io just pisses me off....

kam--

Although I'm not exactly sure what "people like (me)" means? Gay? Australian? What else could you be referring to?

i think he means attractive with a great eye for poster/commercial art....jus' sayin'...

sorry. I swear this program just decides to fuck with us sometimes. There is a 15 minutes time difference between my accidental two replies! How does that happen?

scoot, teehee. thanks a bunch!

you people. you know who you are.

io, allow me to introduce you my little friend, the fucking comma. learn it, love it, use it... maybe then you'll be less of a tosser. really

maybe i should use proper english in a post criticising someone's puncuation: allow me TO introduce... blah blah blah

i messed that up TWICE! bloody hell

allow me to introduce you TO my little friend...

puncTuation. i'm on a roll! just shoot me now

leah -- at this point, i'd just go with the 'it's the thought that counts' defense.....
not to worry.... anyone going with your 'just shoot me now' will have to shoot a few of us first.....

thanks, scoot... that takes a bit of the sting out of my self-inflicted humiliation!

Oh, Leah. Bless ya lil cotton socks.

Oh, and by the way, S&tC is indeed 135 minutes long. I've seen some cinema session times for cinemas down here and they label it at 145 minutes, but they ad 10 minutes for trailers/ads so, yep, 135 minutes it is.

Which, it must be said, could be excellent or terrible. Excellent because, hey, this could very well be the final time we ever see new S&tC material so why not give us bang for our buck. Or terrible, because... well, you know.

As far as European fests to check out, may I recommend Karlovy Vary? It was one of the most enjoyable times I've had at a festival, and it's very reasonable financially once you get there (which is admittedly no small expense these days).

Perhaps Leah's having punctuation problems because she's on her period.

You're a wonderful audience! G'night, everybody!

Weirdest remake news of the year: Nicolas Cage starring in a Werner Herzog directed version of The Bad Lieutenant...what??!

I seriously don't even know what to say, it's just so damn strange.

BAD LIEUTENANT OWNS YOUR ASS.

MS. 45, DRILLER KILLER, FEAR CITY, and especially KING OF NEW YORK similarly OWN ALL.

girlish giggle, kam

Thanks for signing in, . Now you can comment. (sign out)

(If you haven't left a comment here before, you may need to be approved by the site owner before your comment will appear. Until then, it won't appear on the entry. Thanks for waiting.)

URL:
Remember me? YesNo

Comments: