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3... 2... 1... where's lex?

S P E E C H L E S S.

K-STEW even said the word "OWNS."

GREATEST 15 minutes in the *history of time*, I DIDN'T EVEN *BLINK* the entire time, HYPNOTIC TOTAL OWNAGE, greatest thing I've ever seen, LOVE the way she's so serious and INTENSE and INTELLIGENT and AWESOME. And how she plays with her hair = MESMERIZING.

POLAND = AWESOME, excellent interview, ONLY minor stumble is where Poland semi-bags on ZATHURA and K-STEW kind of BALKS that was COOL AS HELL how she jumps to its defense and TAKES PRIDE IN EVERYTHING SHE DOES, SOOOOOOO charming and CHARISMATIC and MAGNETIC and SERIOUS ABOUT HER CRAFT.

If it seems like I'm dialing it down it's only because I don't want to DOUCHE OUT too bad on the OFF CHANCE THE STEW is all, Hey, I wonder what the people thought of that interview, and actually comes here to read the feedback.

I'm sure I will have more to say but now I am going to watch it again and again.

GOOD WORK DAVE, I was almost gonna say, Hey, why not take a chance and tell her to look in the camera and say hi to her fans on The Cold Blog, but given how she was getting a little tense by that point, probably a good idea not to.

BEST LWD EVER, needless to say.

I just don't get it. I would actually venture to say that Ms. Stewart is the 4th most interesting and entertaining person out of this group (and much less attractive, to me, than Ms. Wiig).

CATCH THAT KID!

Jeff, that is okay, just stay out of the way and keep those opinions to yourself.

K-STEW might be reading and she will see who appreciates her INCREDIBLE MAGNETIC AWESOMENESS.

Best part of this is, you KNOW Poland was sitting there thinking of my dumb ass the ENTIRE TIME.

God, I wish I was a film critic. But seriously in this situation I would probably actually FREEZE UP, like worse than the Chris Farley show skit. Only K-STEW, Paris Hilton, Tom Leykis, and probably Cruise would render me 100% speechless in total awe and reverence in person.

Poland, you should have asked her about her performance in SPEAK, which is ONE OF THE GREATEST FILMIC PERFORMANCES I'VE EVER SEEN EVER, on par with Brando, Pacino, De Niro, Nicholson, Olivier, Burton and O'Toole.

K-STEW OWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWNS.

I DIDN'T EVEN WATCH THE FIRST 25 MINUTES, I just forwarded to the OWNAGE.

I AM IN THE BEST MOOD OF MY LIFE RIGHT NOW.

Well, it's all downhill from here. Best to wrap things up on a high note, I say.

I AM GRINNING FROM EAR TO EAR.

POLAND = GOD.

HADER LOOKS LIKE JACK TORRANCE IN THAT PIC.

K-STEW nervously fidgeting = C H A R M I N G.

(PLANVIEW VOICE) CHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARMING!

"Ms. Stewart is... much less attractive, to me, than Ms. Wiig"

Who would have ever guessed that on a thread where Lex is responsible for 5 of the 8 posts, another party would write the most ridiculous thing?

"God, I wish I was a film critic"

No you don't. I gather you still have a full-time job.

Sloanish, I find a successful woman with an amazing sense of humor more attractive than somebody just beyond jailbait-age who still looks like a teenage boy.

So sue me.

Hey...Jeff's right. If you subtract the long hair, Stewart really does look like a teenage boy. I prefer Wiig as well.

I prefer Wiig amd Stewart. Also; comparing girls to 12 year-old boys is rather creepy. She's clearly a young woman. If you are asserting her lack of a large breast region makes her less than a woman, then you are really making a creepy and sexist point. How about state she has a good look, and move on?

12-year-olds, by definition, are not teenagers.

It's still creepy to assert that a young woman of 19 looks like a 12 year old boy. How you fail to connect these dots is beyond me. Seriously; she's a rather stunning woman. Nice of you to belittle her because her boobs are too small for you liking.

You are clearly not understanding my point. Don't blame me, blame Lex for having the creepy, unappropriate crush on her.

Pardon my typo.

It's not inappropriate. She's of age. He's of age. So be it. I simply think this sums things up:

FROM: JEFF MCMAHON
TO: KRISTEN STEWART

"GET BIGGER BOOBS. GOOD DAY!"

I don't think comparing her to a 12 year old boy is creepy. It's not about boobs, it's about general body development. Stewart looks like someone who works very hard to stay what I would guess is underweight.

Yeah, and look at her face. Cut the hair shorter. She's ready for Boys Don't Cry.

Which is creepier, saying she looks like a boy or thinking about LexG spewing all over his computer with the aid of a cheese grater and some lube?

I would like to add that the second is creepier. And that means I'm creepy since I thought of it.

Devin: she's tiny. Do you know a bunch of tiny women? I know a tiny woman, and they do not have to try. That's how they are. IF she's starving herself. Look at her teeth. If not; let it go brother.

Perm: Indeed.

Wow, and here I thought ALL guys had the same taste in women. Color me stunned.

Unwinnable arguments are fun, aren't they?

According to the internet, Kristen Stewart is somewhere between 5'3 and 5'6. This makes her an adult female of completely average height.

The issue I have been raising is that I think it's unpleasant for an adult man potentially old enough to be her father to be publicly lusting after her while she's still 17, which is what Lex did last year. If anyone would like to present a counterargument for how this could be considered appropriate, I'm all ears.

jeffmcm wrote: publicly lusting after her while she's still 17, which is what Lex did last year. If anyone would like to present a counterargument"

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XZHVkJ1wVFM

Technically, she's older than I am but back in the day no one faced prosecution for jacking off to Traci Lords videos. I think it was done partially in jest but I used to hear dudes on the radio have their faux countdown to legal for Lindsay Lohan and Michelle Wie and it didn’t seem offensive. Not condoning anything, just saying…I ain’t mad atcha.

Jeff: you yelled at me for what you did in this very thread with Lex. If what you are mad about is Lex last year and not this year. Throw a brother some connontation. Seriously.

IOI, I don't know to what you are referring. Can you please elaborate and/or explain?

Also, 'connotation' has two n's, not three.

Triple: Well done. The perverse part of me likes the idea of Lex as inheritor of a long tradition in Western literature and art of older men attracted to younger women; in which case, I would say that Lex still needs to redeem himself through art. If he would write a sonnet or awesome heavy-metal song instead of doing what he does (plodding repetition) then he could elevate his project of Kristen Stewart obsession into truly lofty levels, like a modern-day Dante and Beatrice.

Lex: Get to work!

Wow, that was a delightful interview and somehow this all got kind of sordid and unpleasant.

Eh, I know I of all people have no room to complain about bad taste or anyone taking things too far (HA!), but I think an extensive Google search would reveal most -- if not all -- of my K-Stew posts are fairly innocuous and tame, just barely if at all lecherous and mostly just full of generic superlatives like RULES and OWNS and talking about her charisma and presence and BOX OFFICE POTENTIAL and overall AWESOMENESS. I'd be hard-pressed to think of a single time I went overboard in talking about her or "lusting" in a sleazy or disrespectful way... You can consider that disingenuous if you will, and certainly I've posted all manner of bad taste nonsense elsewhere about various other starlets, and have been absurdly persistent in talking up The Stew and do have a major crush... but both as an actress and person I have huge respect for her awesomeness and, hard to describe as it is, the whole thing is way less queasy than I think Jeff is assuming.

Plus, you know, I'm a fat guy who looks like Burt Young.

Now, that said: EMMA ROBERTS, 19 DAYS.

(I kid.)

(And Jeff's 1:55 post was the best thing he's ever posted. That OWNED.)

So now I'm confused - this Kristen Stewart obsession is meant unironically? All this time I thought it was a joke. A weird, prolonged, past-the-expiration-date joke.

Is there any actual basis for it? Because I'm not seeing it. She's a perfectly okay actress with a very average body and a not-distinguished body of work.

And Lex, any of the multiple times you used 'K-Stew' and 'BONE' in the same posting counts as 'lusting', I'd say.

But it's awesome to actually connect with the real you! Hugs,
Jeff

I've read more about Lex's ejaculatory fluids than I ever cared to in my time at this blog, and I'm fairly sure at least some of that was in relation to Kristen Stewart (stop inventing nicknames for people!)

I'm looking forward to seeing this movie, the cast just seems amazing. There's something about Jesse Eisenberg & Kristen Stewart in particular that's really mind boggling, it's hard to pinpoint what, but I just find those two to be a couple of genuine interesting characters. I would have given alot to just sit down and have a chat with them just like that, talking about everything and nothing. Cheers for this one Mr. Poland.

Icecubes in the mouth, haha, that one cracked me up.

K-STEW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

SOOOOOOOOOOOOO C H A R M I N G.

K-STEW is CHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARMING.

Yes she's definitely a charming personality, and also a very naturally beautiful woman, but dude, she's only human nonetheless, don't you think you're exaggerating a little? :P

I find internet crushes on celebrities to be a pretty fascinating part of life, since it only proves the fact that people always love what they cannot hope to get.

PS: Sorry about any typos, I'm tired and English ain't my first language, so bear with me.

Marius, are you a chick?

Even if not, kudos on appreciating K-STEW.

BTW, "KStew" (sic) has officially made the Urban Dictionary as a RECOGNIZED WORD, though I'd like to point out that *I was using it* before Twilight fans, so technically it was coined by LexG.

Hehe yeah I'm a chick, although my parents really hated me, thus the male name.
But seriously, does gender have anything to do with appreciating a talented actress?

I've never understood the part where you have to hate some person you don't even know, just because you're jealous in some form. I guess I'm just loving everybody :)

Bill Hader & Kristin Wiig, Greg Mottola, and Jesse Eisenberg & Kristen Stewart are all rocking :)

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