The Hot Blog

Fucking Movie Reviews is fucking critical perfection. Ever read those reviews where at the end of it you don't know whether the critic liked or disliked the film. I hate those.

At first glance I thought this might be Lexg, but he swears off all animated flicks so I guess not. But the use of the word 'boner' sure suggest a Lexonian mentality.

This reminds me of Mr. Cranky, who I used to visit back in the day. He had some really funny reviews. I'll have to check it out again.

Sadly, that's perfect for most Americans who are too lazy to check out reviews, let alone READ something.

Sigh.

This snide lazy "ironic" site is exactly the type of 'genius' that makes me want to gargle with marbles.

At best this is a tweet of an idea. I get it. I just don't like it.

Mr Cranky.

Cute idea. I'm assuming there's no need to click the link though, right? You can get the joke from this post.

That's lame.

Chirp.

Sorry, but simply inserting "fucking" and/or "shitty" into every review is not funny, just pathetic. Ebert has it exactly right. We are the dumbest. people. ever.

"Ever read those reviews where at the end of it you don't know whether the critic liked or disliked the film."

Those are the kind that are either written by the worst critics, or the best.

I agree with that sigh. That aside, I go with the worst. If you cannot convey an inkling of how you feel about something, then you really should be doing something else.

Mystery, agree about Cranky. His review of Ballistic: Ecks vs Sever is gold.

This is just boring.

So IOI, zero interest in wondering what I might have been referring to, or questioning the premise, or anything along those lines?

Not really surprised, but still.

Dude, not a big fan of you. Sorry.

Eh... don't really get why people think these reviews or funny/clever, but my largest concern here is that the "writer" says that Julie and Julia and Harry Potter are "great" films. Yeepy, yeepy, yikes!!!!

This site made me check out like five movies I otherwise would never have even known about, let alone gone to see. That's what movie reviews should do, inform the public about about what is out there. I don't need a bunch of bloated, self-righteous commentary.

If this is the future of movie reviews then that's okay with me. These are the only reviews that I've read in their entirety in a long, long time.

We live in sad times.

That deserves a little elaboration -

Basically, if you're going to review something with a star rating and a one-liner, it better be a frozen yogurt place or a riding lawnmower. I wouldn't pick a restaurant based on that little information, much less think about something as complicated and multi-faceted as a film. You're basically reducing it to nothing more than a product. And yeah, they're all products, it's the business side of showbiz, but I don't think anyone who genuinely loves film would think of this as something more than a novelty.

Yeah, I'm with "rotten." If not for that site, how would I have heard about G.I. Joe, Harry Potter, Julie & Julia, The Ugly Truth and all those other under-promoted films? The site saves me lots of time and money, as I refuse to see anything that's not "really fucking good." But I might see Julie & Julia, even though it's only "fucking good," 'cause it sounds like there could be some hot lezbo action.

Yasukuni, Summer Hours, The English Surgeon,
Cold Souls, Somers Town...

Two of them I had heard of, but probably was never going to see. Now all five are in my netflix queue.

fuckingmoviereviews does more good for cinema goers in twenty seconds, than four-thousand words from ten different "journalists" with essentially identical opinions about how stupid Michael Bay's last movie was or how vexing Judd Apatow is.

The reason we don't need all the damn reviewers is that they all have essentially the same opinion. I have no interest in reading fourteen paragraphs regurgitating the conventional wisdom about a movie I haven't even seen yet. And guess what? I'm not the only person who feels this way.

Tell me what's out there. I'll check out the trailer and imdb listing and make up my own mind what's worth spending my money on.

rotten: That's fine, but I still don't see what the site offers beside a quick joke. Anyone can find out "what's out there" on any movie site, including the one you mention, imdb.

Thanks for signing in, . Now you can comment. (sign out)

(If you haven't left a comment here before, you may need to be approved by the site owner before your comment will appear. Until then, it won't appear on the entry. Thanks for waiting.)

URL:
Remember me? YesNo

Comments: